This is Daily Dadspeak—daily reflections on becoming a dad, while still growing up myself. You can find the full mini-pod audio list here.
My wife just pulled out of the driveway and drove to the gym all by herself. For you this may not sound remarkable, but for her it’s a milestone. It’s the first time she’s driven on her own for nearly 20 years. And even before then, she hadn’t done it that often. Because in Barcelona, a car is optional. Public transport is cheap, and you can easily get anywhere by bus or metro. But while we’re living this year in the middle of America, driving is pretty mandatory.
Despite my encouragement, even a month ago you never would’ve guessed that she’d be back behind the wheel. She was pretty adamant that it wasn’t going to happen. What changed?
Her big motivation was to play tennis. Tennis lets her completely disconnect from the day-to-day, it reminds her of home, and there’s a great facility right down the road. But to get there, she’d been relying on other people.
They say you can’t teach an old dog new tricks. And I know I’m on dangerous ground evoking the old dog here. But sometimes to get where you need to go, you’ve got to learn new tricks. You can resist and stay where you are, or remain dependent on others. Or you can change your mind, put some time into practice, and then freely navigate to that place you want to be.
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